My Handiwork
Today I accidentally woke up early.
I found that I had a lot of time on my hands.
Having all this time on my hands made me feel like it was a good opportunity to read a book.
So I did.
I held the book in my hands.
It was a rather big book.
So big, in fact, that it occupied both my hands, leaving little room for anything else.
The next thing I knew, the time that had been on my hands was missing.
My eyes darted around the room, searching, until I found it.
There it was, the missing time.
It had left, from the comfort of the space on my hands, into the monotonous, steadily ticking hands of the wall clock.
Those greedy hands had, in their clutches, even more time than mine had had to begin with.
I was very late for work.
Although, I realized, that wasn't a concern.
I didn't have to hurry to my office because I didn't have much work to do.
It's not like I had my hands full or anything.
On the other hand, I did have to head in.
There was an important meeting.
On second thought, I'd probably have to take my wall clock too.
I'd never attended a meeting like this before, but I didn't want to show up underprepared to the meeting of the all-hands.
I concede: this whole piece was extremely contrived and absolutely intolerable.
I'm sure you'd agree, hands down.